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Neo-Dadaist Calendar
Oct. 12th, 2012 05:32 pmNeo-Dadaist Calendar
In the Neo-Dadaist Calendar, it is always Year Zero DY (DY = Dadaist Year). Every year before the current year is -1 (minus one), -2, -3, -4, -5, and so on ad infinitum. Years still in the future are +1, +2, +3, +4, +5, and so on.
Because it is always Year Zero, everyone on Earth is always in some respects a newborn. If you really wish to calculate your age in this calendar, then your date of birth becomes rather simple. If you were born 30 years ago, you were born in the year Minus 30. That is, until you turn 31, at which point you were born in the year Minus 31.
The point of this calendar is to show the absurdity of the concept of time, the absurdity of setting any kind of importance on the date, and just for shits and giggles. For example, there will never be any panic about the world ending at the 1000th year, because it is always Year Zero and will always remain Year Zero no matter how old you get to be.
There are thirteen months: . . Weekday names:
1. Unicorn (Jan 1 - 28) . . . . 1. Silverware
2. Bicycle (Jan 29 – Feb 25) . . . . . 2. Terabyte
3. Triceratops (Feb 26 – Mar 25) . . . . 3. Lotion
4. Lioness (Mar 26 – April 22) . . . .. 4. Eggplant
5. Pentagram (April 23 – May 20) . . . . 5. Rockabilly
6. Cockroach (May 21 – Jun 17) . . . 6. Autism
7. Septic Tank (Jun 18 – Jul 15) . . . 7. Bagpipe
8. Chaostar [cow-star] (Jul 16 – Aug 12) . 8. Buttplug (month of Imaginus only)
9. Nonsense (Aug 13 – Sept 9)
10. Pentagramagon (Sept 10 – Oct 7)
11. Fairy Tale (Oct 8 – Nov 4)
12. Double Jew (Nov 5 – Dec 2)
13. Coven (Dec 3 – Dec 31)
14. Imaginus (once every 4 years, Feb 29)
All 13 months have 4 weeks (28 days) in them, except for Coven, which has 5 weeks (29 days); the last week of the year is one day long. Every Leap Year, the month of Triceratops will be paused while the extra day is considered its own month, and will resume when leap year day is over. Since it is always Year Zero, the calendar is always exactly the same, unlike the Gregorian calendar. If a date falls on an Eggplant or Bagpipe, it will always be on an Eggplant or Bagpipe.
You may have noticed, each month's name is in some way related to its number. Some of these are obvious, like Unicorn, Bicycle, and Triceratops. Others are not so clear. Lioness is named for a lioness having 4 legs. Cockroach has 6 legs. The Sept in Septic tank is related to the Latin root for Seven, a Chaostar has 8 points, the Non in Nonsense is Latin for 9, and a Pentagramagon is a pentagram inside of a pentagon (5+5=10). Fairy Tale comes from the fact that in Spanish, 11 is “once” (on-say), looking like “once” in “Once upon a time,” the beginning of many fairy tales. And Jews tend to wear the Star of David, which has six points. Six plus six equals twelve, hence “Double Jew.”
The weeks are the same number of days (7), and the year starts the same day as the normal Gregorian calendar (1 January). Only weekday names are different. Weekday names have no relation to their number.
On leap years, the 29th of February (Gregorian) is considered its own month, called Imaginus. This month has its own weekday, Buttplug. The month of Triceratops shall pause for this month and resume, after Imaginus is over, as though it had never happened. This leap day's date should always be expressed as Buttplug, -1 Imaginus, -0 DY. Please notice that it says “negative” in front of “1” and “0.” This is because Imaginus is even less real a concept than the concept of time itself, and therefore is negative time (in the scientific sense of “negative,” not the New Age sense).
Today's date in the Gregorian calendar is Saturday, 6th of October 2012 CE. Because the Neo-Dadaist Calendar uses a variation on the European notation, the date in the Neo-Dadaist Calendar is Day/Month/Year. Thus 6/10/2012 (Sat Oct 6th 2012 CE) in Gregorian becomes A 27/10/0 (Autism, 27 Pentagramagon 0 DY). This version of the notation includes the letter for the day of the week.
By the time I post this on Friday, October 12, 2012 CE, it will be Rockabilly, 5 Fairy Tale 0 DY.
I was born July 1st. So in this calendar, I was born Bagpipe, 14 Septic Tank, -30 DY.
Link to a picture of the Gregorian-to-Neo-Dadaist calendar graphic: http://i836.photobucket.com/albums/zz285/Alex_antonin/neodadaist_calendar2.png
In the Neo-Dadaist Calendar, it is always Year Zero DY (DY = Dadaist Year). Every year before the current year is -1 (minus one), -2, -3, -4, -5, and so on ad infinitum. Years still in the future are +1, +2, +3, +4, +5, and so on.
Because it is always Year Zero, everyone on Earth is always in some respects a newborn. If you really wish to calculate your age in this calendar, then your date of birth becomes rather simple. If you were born 30 years ago, you were born in the year Minus 30. That is, until you turn 31, at which point you were born in the year Minus 31.
The point of this calendar is to show the absurdity of the concept of time, the absurdity of setting any kind of importance on the date, and just for shits and giggles. For example, there will never be any panic about the world ending at the 1000th year, because it is always Year Zero and will always remain Year Zero no matter how old you get to be.
There are thirteen months: . . Weekday names:
1. Unicorn (Jan 1 - 28) . . . . 1. Silverware
2. Bicycle (Jan 29 – Feb 25) . . . . . 2. Terabyte
3. Triceratops (Feb 26 – Mar 25) . . . . 3. Lotion
4. Lioness (Mar 26 – April 22) . . . .. 4. Eggplant
5. Pentagram (April 23 – May 20) . . . . 5. Rockabilly
6. Cockroach (May 21 – Jun 17) . . . 6. Autism
7. Septic Tank (Jun 18 – Jul 15) . . . 7. Bagpipe
8. Chaostar [cow-star] (Jul 16 – Aug 12) . 8. Buttplug (month of Imaginus only)
9. Nonsense (Aug 13 – Sept 9)
10. Pentagramagon (Sept 10 – Oct 7)
11. Fairy Tale (Oct 8 – Nov 4)
12. Double Jew (Nov 5 – Dec 2)
13. Coven (Dec 3 – Dec 31)
14. Imaginus (once every 4 years, Feb 29)
All 13 months have 4 weeks (28 days) in them, except for Coven, which has 5 weeks (29 days); the last week of the year is one day long. Every Leap Year, the month of Triceratops will be paused while the extra day is considered its own month, and will resume when leap year day is over. Since it is always Year Zero, the calendar is always exactly the same, unlike the Gregorian calendar. If a date falls on an Eggplant or Bagpipe, it will always be on an Eggplant or Bagpipe.
You may have noticed, each month's name is in some way related to its number. Some of these are obvious, like Unicorn, Bicycle, and Triceratops. Others are not so clear. Lioness is named for a lioness having 4 legs. Cockroach has 6 legs. The Sept in Septic tank is related to the Latin root for Seven, a Chaostar has 8 points, the Non in Nonsense is Latin for 9, and a Pentagramagon is a pentagram inside of a pentagon (5+5=10). Fairy Tale comes from the fact that in Spanish, 11 is “once” (on-say), looking like “once” in “Once upon a time,” the beginning of many fairy tales. And Jews tend to wear the Star of David, which has six points. Six plus six equals twelve, hence “Double Jew.”
The weeks are the same number of days (7), and the year starts the same day as the normal Gregorian calendar (1 January). Only weekday names are different. Weekday names have no relation to their number.
On leap years, the 29th of February (Gregorian) is considered its own month, called Imaginus. This month has its own weekday, Buttplug. The month of Triceratops shall pause for this month and resume, after Imaginus is over, as though it had never happened. This leap day's date should always be expressed as Buttplug, -1 Imaginus, -0 DY. Please notice that it says “negative” in front of “1” and “0.” This is because Imaginus is even less real a concept than the concept of time itself, and therefore is negative time (in the scientific sense of “negative,” not the New Age sense).
Today's date in the Gregorian calendar is Saturday, 6th of October 2012 CE. Because the Neo-Dadaist Calendar uses a variation on the European notation, the date in the Neo-Dadaist Calendar is Day/Month/Year. Thus 6/10/2012 (Sat Oct 6th 2012 CE) in Gregorian becomes A 27/10/0 (Autism, 27 Pentagramagon 0 DY). This version of the notation includes the letter for the day of the week.
By the time I post this on Friday, October 12, 2012 CE, it will be Rockabilly, 5 Fairy Tale 0 DY.
I was born July 1st. So in this calendar, I was born Bagpipe, 14 Septic Tank, -30 DY.
Link to a picture of the Gregorian-to-Neo-Dadaist calendar graphic: http://i836.photobucket.com/albums/zz285/Alex_antonin/neodadaist_calendar2.png
