alex_antonin: (memetically active)
“War Wounds”
By = Alexander Antonin

Every time I see a practical joke, I cringe.
Every time someone laughs at someone else's pain,
I feel their pain as my own,
And I revisit past pain of my own.
They think they're being funny, I think they're being scum.
They feel amusement, I feel fear and rage.
It's just my war wounds acting up,
PTSD flashbacks from the battlefield of my childhood,
The shells and mortars and bullets of peer abuse.

Elementary school, where being different makes you a target,
Everyone declaring war on the weird kid,
Who now has to cross no-man's land for 8 hours
Before returning to the safety of the bunker.
Teachers were like non-combatant civilians on the field,
Mostly useless whether they were on your side or not;
Asking them for help only drew more enemy fire,
And some of them were traitors to the cause.

I had no brothers in arms in the trenches; it was just me.
My leaders didn't even know I was at war, at first,
And didn't provide many munitions or barbed wire when they found out.
It wasn't malice, only helplessness and ignorance;
Their economy was unprepared for war,
And they weren't on the front lines, they didn't know the stakes.
And it's hard to support the troops when they can't give you good intel,
Because they're a shell-shocked child too scared to speak.

Then, after years of safety at home, suddenly there's constant noise.
The blaring air raid siren that was my sister,
Always going off for some reason or other.
A different kind of battle, a different kind of enemy,
International war at school, civil war at home.
Supporting the troops was no longer an option,
They were too busy fighting Godzilla
To have a thought to spare for my own war.

And don't even get me started on high school!
Me: genderqueer, androgynous, publicly identified as male.
Them: Sexually harassing me, bullying me, catcalling from cars,
Getting in my personal space, touching me without consent;
All this, and sexual assault (just shy of rape) for four years.
Now I flinch at every touch, and honking cars.
Now I question every compliment, in case it's sarcastic.
Now all whispering people are talking about me,
Or so my brain tells me.

My war wounds act up, and I act out,
Lashing out at the slightest perception of enemy fire,
Making pre-emptive strikes against enemy insurgents,
When I'm not holed up in my bunker or a tank.
“Veteran of the Psychic Wars” by BÖC is my national anthem,
Because “the war still rages on and there's no end that I know,”
And “I can't say if I'm ever gonna be free,”
But their “Sole Survivor” is my “Purple Mountains Majesty.”
alex_antonin: Alex Avatar (Alex Avatar)
“Gun Nuts”
By = Alexander Antonin

Metal penis replacement, fatal sperm;
Must impregnate everything with death.
A more perfect rape metaphor I've not seen before,
Sex and violence all wrapped up in one.
Rape Bambi to death with your metal cock,
In the name of feeding yourself (what lies!),
But the proof of your bestiality is hanging on the wall.
You want to rape humans with your metal sperm, I know it.

Open carry a murder machine and nobody says a thing
(As long as you're white; redneck not necessary but preferred),
But carry a dildo and everyone gives you shit.
Torture and murder are rated PG,
But your own body is rated X.
Nothing more pro-life than sex, nothing less so than guns.
Puritans were the true abominations,
Their filth and rot persistent as black mold.

Murder in the name of “pro-life” is the ultimate hypocrisy;
Your own Bible gives instructions on how to perform an abortion,
But you fuckers wouldn't read to save your lives.
I knew more about your faith at 10 than you know about it now, how sad is that?
Sadder still, that I had to learn it to protect myself,
As I was literally – no shitting you – terrorized in school by “Christian” hypocrites
Who would've shot Jesus dead on sight because he was middle-eastern,
All because I wouldn't join their cult.

I'm more scared of white terrorists than I'll ever be of the brown kind.
I've never met a brown terrorist, but I pass white ones every day in the street,
Whether they terrorize with murder or with words
(And words can be scarier than guns,
Casually threatening the lives of their enemies, even those hiding in plain sight).
I don't know any victims of brown terrorism,
But everyone I know has had their lives affected by the white kind.
Everyone I know has family or coworkers who're white terrorists.

Gun nuts are the worst kind of white terrorists,
Thinking they have the right to casually threaten my life.
The fact they don't know I'm queer/trans/pagan/whatever doesn't matter;
As soon as they find out, I'm a target.
As soon as they find out, they might kill me; no joke, no exaggeration.
Open carry is a murder threat, it's terrorism;
I see a gun, I think I'm gonna die,
And they get off on my fear.

So pardon me if I won't be reasonable
With people who are consistently unreasonable and violent.
Pardon me if I won't pander to the gun nuts
With their metal penis replacements,
Terrorizing everyone around them with the threat of murder,
All because they're full of ignorance and hatred.
Pardon me if I disrespect people who consistently disrespect my existence,
Just because a gun is the only dick they can get up.
alex_antonin: TST Antifascist (Default)
The person this poem is aimed at will likely never see it. It is not aimed at anyone currently in my life in any way, even though they are still alive. You may guess who it is all you like, but whoever you guess, you're probably wrong.

“Venom”
By = Alexander Antonin

Oh you're so hurt, poor little babe,
In so much turmoil, emotional pain!
You weep in pain and scream in rage,
Or so says the FUCKING phage!

You came in uninvited, a fucking mistake,
One that somebody should have fucking ERASED!
You ruined our lives, you soulless damned maggot,
Then had the audacity to call me a faggot!

Our home was once so peaceful and calm,
And then you, fucking filth, came on along!
So innocent-looking, you came into our life,
And began, shortly after, to fill it with strife!

Before you came, my life wasn't great,
All day long I received abuse and hate.
But then I'd go home to be safe and at peace,
At least until you showed up, you worthless beast!

Every day was a war, bombs falling left and right,
And once you came along, no sanctuary in sight!
I fought you, I did, since no one else would,
And now I wish I'd got you good!

We locked horns and battled for years,
Then when it looked like I'd win, you broke out in tears;
Played the victim, and I got the boot,
Gods how I wish I'd stabbed your damned foot!

You kept playing it up, fucking liar from Hell,
Got out the razors, did “emo” so well!
Blamed me for everything, when I'd only fought to survive,
Gods how I wish you were no longer alive!

You went 'cross the street, not down the lane,
Here, let me help you try it again!
Your lame-ass suicide attempt was faker than fake,
I hope you go drown in a fucking lake!

Now you have the balls to say you hate me?
The feeling it mutual, I fucking assure thee.
Manipulative, worthless, puddle of radioactive slime,
I wouldn't save your life even to save mine!

You're a waste of resources, and - let me be crass,
You're a festering sore on humanity's ass!
I don't care how wonderful others say you've been,
If you were on fire, I'd add gasoline!

I wish the venom for you that I feel
Could be a physical thing so fucking real,
So I could spit it in your eyes and watch them boil,
To thank you for a life of rage and turmoil!

So fuck you very much, you tower of ire,
I hope you die screaming in a horrible fire!
It's too bad Hell's on earth, you festering puddle of spew,
Because burning for eternity would be TOO GOOD FOR YOU!
alex_antonin: TST Antifascist (Default)
I admit, I had pretty much given up on this. But someone donated $5 to my emergency fund, and I already had this recorded and waiting, so here I give you Celebrity Interview with Vick Shunnel! Today, Vick interviews Maggie McIntosh, the Discordian Grim Reaper arrested on suspicion of being a serial killer (she's innocent, though, of the crime). Maggie McIntosh is voiced by Lilla Elteto.

You might need to turn the volume up.

Youtube:



Link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2_9GvF4ctn8

Transcript under the cut )

Life

Feb. 6th, 2009 12:09 am
alex_antonin: TST Antifascist (Default)
"Life"
by Alexander Antonin

Life! Vogue ewe pup tea glass bowl whiff hay and green aide.

Oy vey

Nov. 13th, 2008 11:55 pm
alex_antonin: TST Antifascist (Default)
This NaBloWriMo thing is being kind of annoying. It's hard thinking of stuff to post about all the time, in four different LJs. Though, hmm...

I found a "Zine" at the library today called Steampunk Magazine. I checked out three issues. I like it a lot, I might submit a story to them. Though I don't know whether to submit "Channeling Icarus" or "The Tea Party" first. "Channeling Icarus" is fantasy on another planet in a nation whose technology level is similar to the Victorian/steam power era, except with magic. The main character, Lord Reuben, is studying a Demon when a pair of creatures called Harún show up to interfere. And "The Tea Party" introduces the character Lord Lichter, a very eccentric genius inventor. It takes place on an alternate Earth in the early 1900's; that planet's history was essentially 99.5% identical to our own history, at least until Lord Lichter started inventing stuff, because he invents all kinds of things that are not only ahead of his time, but ahead of our time, too. In the first (and so far, only) story, "The Tea Party," he has invented a time machine among other things.

Which do you think I should submit?

If this ends up being posted after midnight, it counts for both today and yesterday, because I started this post at 11:40.

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alex_antonin: TST Antifascist (Default)
Bishop Sanctimonious the Hypocritical

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